


Personal Demons

by The Black Sluggard (Hazgarn)



Category: Castle
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Denial, Episode Related, F/M, Humor, M/M, One-Sided Relationship, Pre-Slash, Realization, Romance, Slash, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-05
Updated: 2011-12-05
Packaged: 2017-10-26 22:21:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/288531
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hazgarn/pseuds/The%20Black%20Sluggard
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In a loving universe, the "monster fight" after the disastrous dinner might have gone something like this...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Personal Demons

They were already five minutes into the argument when they reached Lanie's apartment. Despite that, it still hadn't gone anywhere. They both seemed to be circling the central issue fruitlessly, and when they reached her door, Javier finally broke.

"Look, Lane, is the problem... Do you want to get married?"

His voice totally didn't squeak when he said it. No. Not one bit. He was proud of that. Though he didn't get to enjoy the fact very long before Lanie frowned softly, shaking her head.

"No, Javier, of course not."

She said it quietly, her voice almost sympathetic, a fact that twitched across the back of Javier's mind as very wrong for the situation.

"Of course not? What does that mean, 'of course not'? Because we could totally get married—" Which he bit off quickly, because what the hell was he saying, seriously? "What does that even mean?"

"What it means is this is fun, Javier, and I don't mind being a stopping point," she said, raising an eyebrow coolly, "But I refuse to be a beard."

"A b— What?" He laughed, startled, incredulous, and he knew a little guilty. "What are you talking about?"

Lanie smiled at him then, her eyes uncharacteristically soft, almost pitying.

"If you don't know, I'm not the one to tell you the answer." She sighed. "I think we need to cool things off. Just until you know what you really want."

Stunned as she leaned over and kissed his cheek and stepped into her apartment, he was left trying to process—unsuccessfully—as he made his way down to his car. Once he got there, he sat quietly behind the wheel, mind churning as he tried to figure out what he was supposed to do next.

He could call Kevin—but no, his partner was probably still out with Jenny, or just getting back. He should wait a few hours, then call Kevin. Only, it settled sickly in his stomach that Kevin and fiance might be occupied all night. Maybe not likely, given the disaster that had ended the night, but there was always the chance. He could call Kevin in the morning, though that still begged the question of what on earth he was going to do with himself until then... And as he tried to get a handle on the chaos of his thoughts understanding trickled in slowly.

Still, while the realization was gradual, like lights being turned up in a dim room, it was like a punch to the gut once he managed to see what had always been right in front of him.


End file.
